The people who know me, know I am not a fan of posting my personal life online but when my grandmah passed away I felt it was one way I could let her know I am thinking about her even if I am on the other side of the globe right now.
Like all grandmothers, mine was totally awesome, my memories of her are full of stories I had no idea existed, games of bingo and a total embodiment of a long life. She had a wicked sense of humour and was so adamant and strong willed even when she couldn’t walk very far or see very well she would still keep going.
When she could see well, she use to knit and crochet hats in all kinds of shapes and sizes. (She is wearing one in this picture) Everyone who wore them loved these hats and she even took special requests. My grandmah use to make and replicate designer clothes, dye her hair purple and have a glass of wine and eat cheese and crackers in the afternoon. She birthed six children, never travelled far from home and made friends wherever she went. There is no such thing as strangers, just friends she had not met yet.
I am feeling pretty disconnected from my family, and wondering what I should do? Drop everything and fly back to be part of the memorial and then what? In the past when a family member passed away and I was unable to attend the funeral I had my own ceremony for them to wish them a safe onward journey and treasure the time we did have together on this planet. I don’t feel this as being disrespectful because this is my way of saying goodbye and offer my tears of joy (for what was) and sadness (for their departure) as gratitude and solace.
She came from a generation of no TV, no mobile phones or internet and it was a time when it was cool to smoke and un-cool if your dress was too short. Her favourite colour was red, she use to tap dance as a child and one of her favourite songs was Spanish Eyes, I use to love watching her eyes light up when she started to sing it and try to remember the words and like all awesome grandmah’s she always made sure you knew that you are loved.
Grandmothers, ultimately are the elders in our tribe, our parents would not be here without them. They are a link to our ancestors and sometimes understand us and accept who we are better then our parents.
This Rumi, Fountain of Fire poem is for her as she transcends over the rainbow from this life onto the next cycle.
Unknown existence
undiscovered beauty
that’s how you are
so far
but
one dawn
just like a sun
right from within
you will arise
For her adventurous spirit, the sparkle of mischief in her eyes and her open generous heart, I love you gMah.
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